An amazing turnaround.....

For some reason, particular dates have coinciding events and have a special meaning to me. For instance, I have a niece Christi, who was born on February 19, 1985. That day.....that very day....would have been my paternal grandmother's 100th birthday. Her name was Donnie Mae Jackson Hall. In 1885, the feminine form of Donald, was Donnie. Over the years it changed to Donna. When I was born my parents named me Donald but called me Donnie after her. Early in my career, I had a boss tell me that 'Don' sounded more professional. I used to go by Don at work and Donnie everywhere else. At some point, I decided that I really didn't care about having a professional sounding name, I wanted to be called by the same name everywhere I went. Therefore, please call me Donnie. But I digress...

Another date that is important, though sad, is February 7. February 7 was my brother Steve's birthday. I've written about Steve several times on here, (see Missing the Rodeo...) I had two brothers, Randy was the oldest, Steve was younger. Both have passed on....but February 7 is my 'Dark Day', because Randy passed away on Steve's birthday. It is a day that I miss them both.

However, February now has another special day to add to its list. February 6. Here's the story. If you've kept up with my blog, you can probably surmise that the year 2008 was terrible for me personally (as well as many others) For me it was divorce...shrinking investments....job loss.....ugh. I was laid off at the worst possible time for someone in the software industry, mid-November. Late in the year, companies in the software industry basically hunker down for the holidays. Annual budgets are at their end, annual projects are coming to a close, nothing new will be started until after the holidays are over. No one is hiring, or even wants to talk about hiring until after New Year's Day. By the Grace of God, I was able to find enough short term contract work to keep my head above water. I did the work that I could find, and worked on promoting myself, networking, rewriting resumes....etc. etc. etc.

Some time in mid to late January, calls started to come. I spent a lot of time on the phone (I dread that bill) and chased every lead I had. They all seemed to lead to dead ends. Finally, finally, finally on February 6, I got a call from someone that I had worked with many years ago. She was in a hiring position, had an opening, and found out that I was available. We met on that day, talked about the position and one week later, I accepted a formal offer. More details to come on that.

The coinciding event that makes that day special, however, was a conversation that I had with another friend from days gone by. We had recently reconnected and was catching up on the previous 25 years or so. She mentioned that she and some friends from the past were meeting for an impromptu reunion. I asked who she was meeting because we went to school together and I probably knew some of the folks she was meeting. As she was listing the names, I knew most of the folks she was meeting...then....lightning struck, she mentioned a name that I hadn't heard or thought of in years.

Hopefully, you are old enough to remember the Donnie Osmond song 'Puppy Love'. One of the things that I can remember my mom saying was "It may be puppy love....but it's real to the puppies". Many years ago, when I was in the 5th or 6th grade, I became infatuated with someone. She was in a grade below me, but she was the most beautiful thing that my eyes had ever seen. Curly blond hair, an infectious smile, she lit up the lunchroom ;-)

At the time, I was scared to death of girls. That is a very scary time in a boy's life, you have no idea how the whole relationship thing works, or at least I didn't. I don't know that I ever spoke to her in those days. Much to my chagrin, I recently found out that she had no idea who I was, but that's ok.

As it turns out....the girl with the curly blond hair and the infectious smile, is single now. One evening, we met at a restaurant, we wound up talking for about 3 hours. As we were talking, I experienced what I refer to as an emotional sneak attack. It was unbelievable, some of those emotions that I felt in the lunchroom 35 years ago came back....I remembered that feeling....in some small way...I healed that night.

Divorce is tough in every way. I can remember thinking, "I will NEVER EVER put myself in a position to be hurt that way again" Along the way, someone told me, "You will know that you have healed when you realize that you COULD fall in love again, because there is nothing like being in love".I didn't fall in love mind you...but...I remembered the feeling....and in some small way began to see the glimmer of a hope....that some day....I would be able to fall in love again.....for that.....I am grateful...